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I’ve been telecommuting since well, before some of you young uns were born. And it pains me to see ya’ll struggle to get your lives right with all this social distancing. Social distancing is my jam. Glad they are calling it something other than “don’t want to be bothered with folks, why can’t we just stay home and see what’s popping?” But anyway… To all my office commuting friends who assumed I was sitting around in yoga pants, munching chips and binge watching 坚果加速器app官网 (again) all day…. how ya like me now?

Okay yes, I do frequent my home office in yoga pants. It’s my office in my home as a grown woman, I can do what I want. (Come for my yoga pants and see how that works out) But as for the rest of it, you are now learning what I’ve known for over 10 years. Working from home #WFH is nothing to be played with.

Some Pros:

• Yes, your commute rocks.

• You know all of your food and Amazon delivery folks by name

• Yes you can stream your favorite music/movie/podcast whenever you feel like it

Some Cons:

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• Your family/friends do not respect boundaries, they think you have time to “catch up” on laundry and chores and errands and cooking gourmet meals

• You sometimes stay in pajamas all week day

What’s real is that you have to be disciplined about your schedule. Your life could be conference call, conference call, email, conference call, eat at desk, conference call, email, time to sleep, OMG what day is it and how long have I been in this t-shirt if you’re not careful. If you have kids at home, you have to set rules and find them something to do. Nothing says “my kids run this house” like the sound and sight of sprinting, screaming children laser focused on destruction while you’re trying to speak professionally about supply chain (or whatever you do).

If you have a significant other at home, you must set rules. Did I share the time that an ex thought it would be sexy to come out of the shower and do a Chippendale’s worthy boogie in my office… while I was on video?! The four women I was on with truly appreciated the show. Me… not so much.

If you have pets, you have to set rules. We know you love My. Fluffington and Duke but perhaps we don’t need Fluffy controlling the mouse when you are leading the call? Maybe Duke should stay downstairs to greet UPS at the top of his lungs? I’m just saying.

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1. Set up an actual office or area to work from. Sofa Central and Serta Cubicle never work out well. I have an ergonomic chair, wireless keyboard, two monitors and a speakerphone (my cell works through it). Get supplies be they sticky notes or Skittles, set up your type of normal. Lighting and climate control are key. No one wants to feel like they are working in a cold damp basement… even if you are.

2. If you are going to be on video, check out what will be behind you when you speak. You may find your collection of skulls (I’ve actually seen this) and pre-historic bones delightful but think about your audience and keep it neutral. I tend to go with a beach picture.If you’re going to be on video, what are you wearing? I almost hopped on a call with my VP in a t-shirt that said “Ya’ll need Jesus, I need Jose Cuervo” Not a good lok.

3. Test your internet speed. If everyone in the family is at home on their tablets, on their cells, streaming stuff - can you connect? Check early and often.

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5. Plan meals in advance. This is a pro-tip. It’s rookie move to realize it’s 2:00pm and you’ve only had two twizzlers and three cups of coffee all day. Sandwiches, wraps and salads are a quick thing you can prep in advance, toss together and at least get through the day without gnawing your arm off. Don’t be that guy on speaker phone driving through McDonald’s at 3:00pm ordering all of the things.

6. Hydrate. I can’t stress this enough. Hydration will save you. But also…

7. Don’t forget to pee. I’m serious. It’s a thing. You’re trying to get through the last 12 emails before you get up from the desk and then the phone rings… just don’t. Trust me. Look up UTI on Google.

8. You and your neighbors have got to get on the same page. I had a neighbor who thought lunch was from 11 - 1 and lunch meant he would sit out on his back patio playing Metallica at impressive decibels. Hey, I like the riff from Enter Sandman as much as anyone else, I just didn’t need it as the backdrop to my day. Every day. For two hours. We had a chat. He now owns headphones.

9. Get up and walk around when you can. Breathe fresh air. Stretch.

10. Working from home does not mean sleep in, meander onto calls, take early and long lunch and then disappear at 3:00pm. Your manager notices. Chances are your HR team is monitoring your login and logoff time and the amount of work being done in the time.

Don’t be this guy:

Stay safe, stay well, stay sane, stay employed.